Father’s Day, June 17, 2012 from Philippians 2:20
Theme: Effective spiritual mentoring is like a father/son relationship.
(Unless otherwise noted, all Scripture references are taken from The Holy Bible, New King James Version; copyright 1982, Thomas Nelson, Inc.)
I ask you to turn briefly with me to Philippians 2; and to a passage that we looked last week. Tucked in the middle of that passage is a single verse that sets the tone for what I feel led to share with you this morning in honor of Fathers’ Day.
The apostle Paul had been writing to his dear brothers and sisters in Philippi. He wished that he could come and minister to them personally; but he could not. He was in a prison cell somewhere in Rome. But even though he himself couldn’t come to them, he was glad to be able to send in his place a very precious co-laborer in the gospel. In verses 19-24, he wrote;
But I trust in the Lord Jesus to send Timothy to you shortly, that I also may be encouraged when I know your state. For I have no one like-minded, who will sincerely care for your state. For all seek their own, not the things which are of Christ Jesus. But you know his proven character, that as a son with his father he served with me in the gospel. Therefore I hope to send him at once, as soon as I see how it goes with me. But I trust in the Lord that I myself shall also come shortly (Philippians 2:19-24).
Timothy was a beloved co-laborer of Paul’s. The relationship between Paul and Timothy is one of the greatest stories of loving ministry partnership in the Bible. And do you notice how Paul referred to him in verse 22 of the passage I just read to you? He wrote, “But you know his proven character, that as a son with his father he served with me in the gospel.” That’s a wonderful commendation.
But what does exactly does that mean? In what ways was Timothy’s relationship with Paul in the work of the gospel like that of a son to a father? I believe that the nature of this ‘father/son’ relationship is something very relevant, and has some important lessons to teach us about how we are to grow in our Christian lives.
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If you’ll stop and reflect for a moment on your own walk with the Lord Jesus, you’ll recognize that there have been some relationships in your life that are like the relationship between Paul and Timothy. We would call them “mentoring” relationships—the kind of relationships in which one person who is older and more mature in the Lord comes along-side someone who is younger and less experienced in the Lord, and coaches and guides them along in their walk with the Lord and in their service to Him. If you’re a man, it’s another ‘elder brother’. If you’re a woman, it’s another ‘elder sister’. Sometimes that relationship is clearly and intentionally a mentoring relationship; one in which a very deliberate agenda of growth is pursued. But at other times, that relationship isn’t so clearly defined. It just sort of happens in the context of a friendship, or in some shared ministry experience. Sometimes you are like the ‘Timothy’ to someone else’s ‘Paul’; and at other times, you play ‘Paul’ to someone else’s ‘Timothy’.
I have cherished those relationships in my life. Perhaps, if you are aware of them in your own life, you have cherished them too. In fact, I feel that—at just about any one time in our lives; if we look carefully—we can see how we’re either a Paul or a Timothy to someone else. If we’re at all serious about our faith, we’ll find that there’s almost always someone ahead of us in the Christian walk who’s example we are learning from and are imitating; or someone just behind us along the way who is learning from us and imitating our walk with Jesus.
This morning, I am asking that we look closer at the relationship that Paul and Timothy shared together. What was it about their relationship that made it such an effective one for mentoring in work of Christ? Or to be more specific; in what ways did Timothy served with Paul as a ‘son’ would have served in ministry with a ‘father’?
And to explore the answer to that question, I invite you to turn with me to a letter in the New Testament in which Paul gives some of his deepest expressions of affection and care for his beloved ‘spiritual son’ Timothy. Second Timothy is Paul’s last New Testament letter—one that he wrote just before he was put to death for his faith in Christ. And as we examine this letter, I believe we’ll find some of the ways that the relationship between Paul and Timothy was a wonderful, spiritually rich ‘father/son’ relationship in the Lord—and learn how to have a richer experience in our own mentoring relationships in Christ.
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As soon as you open your Bible to 2 Timothy, you’ll see one of the essential qualities of a good, healthy, spiritually enriching, Christ-honoring, mentoring relationship. Obviously, before someone can be the spiritual father to a spiritual son, there must have been a spiritual birth. And that’s what we find in the first five verses; that . . .
1. A SPIRITUAL BIRTH MUST OCCUR.
Paul begins;
Paul, an apostle of Jesus Christ by the will of God, according to the promise of life which is in Christ Jesus,
To Timothy, a beloved son:
Grace, mercy, and peace from God the Father and Christ Jesus our Lord.
I thank God, whom I serve with a pure conscience, as my forefathers did, as without ceasing I remember you in my prayers night and day, greatly desiring to see you, being mindful of your tears, that I may be filled with joy, when I call to remembrance the genuine faith that is in you, which dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice, and I am persuaded is in you also (2 Timothy 1:1-5).
Look carefully at verse five. Paul said that he rejoiced when he called to remembrance “the genuine faith that is in you, which dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice, and I am persuaded is in you also.” Paul—as many students of the Bible believe—had been the one that had led Timothy to the Lord. And apparently, Paul was also very familiar with the godly Christian faith of Timothy’s grandmother Lois, and of his mother Eunice. He knew the faith in Christ that was a significant part of Timothy’s spiritual pedigree. And so, what a commendation it was for Paul to say to him, “I am persuaded” that this same Christian faith “is in you also.” Paul was not a man to throw out compliments insincerely! For the apostle to say that the faith that is in Timothy is a “genuine” one means that, as far as he was concerned, Timothy truly was the real deal. He had genuinely trusted Jesus Christ as his Savior; and was walking in a vital, personal, active, loving relationship with Him as the Lord of His life.
That’s one of the secrets to the effectiveness of their relationship. It is, in fact, the basis of it. Timothy could serve with Paul as a son with a father, because they both had the same principle of life in operation in them—eternal life through faith in Christ. They were both “born again”. That’s why Paul—at the beginning of his first letter to him—could call Timothy “a true son in the faith” (1 Timothy 1:2).
And this would be a good time for me to pause and ask: Do you share that essential principle of eternal life? Have you trusted Jesus Christ as your Savior? Are you born again? That truly is the place to begin.
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Paul truly could be a spiritual father to Timothy, and Timothy truly could be a spiritual son to him, because they were both born again. A birth had genuinely occurred; and Paul was the one who had “begotten” Timothy in Christ.
And just as is true in any good ‘father/son’ relationship . . .
2. A GOOD EXAMPLE MUST BE SET.
Paul knew that, as a good spiritual father to Timothy, he was—even then—setting an example for him to follow. And he encouraged Timothy to follow that example carefully and intentionally. In 2 Timothy 3:10-15, he wrote;
But you have carefully followed my doctrine, manner of life, purpose, faith, longsuffering, love, perseverance, persecutions, afflictions, which happened to me at Antioch, at Iconium, at Lystra—what persecutions I endured. And out of them all the Lord delivered me. Yes, and all who desire to live godly in Christ Jesus will suffer persecution. But evil men and impostors will grow worse and worse, deceiving and being deceived. But you must continue in the things which you have learned and been assured of, knowing from whom you have learned them, and that from childhood you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus (2 Timothy 3:10-15).
Paul was very conscious of how God had appointed him to be an example to others of the Christian faith. In Philippians 4:9, Paul wrote, “The things which you learned and received and heard and saw in me, these do, and the God of peace will be with you.” In 1 Corinthians 11:1, he wrote, “Imitate me, just as I also imitate Christ.” And Timothy had learned to watch Paul’s faithfulness to Christ—even in a time of suffering. Paul told him to “carefully follow” the example he had set for him; and to “continue in the things” that he had learned.
And this wasn’t to be true just of Paul’s actions, but also of his teaching. Earlier in the letter, he told Timothy,
Hold fast the pattern of sound words which you have heard from me, in faith and love which are in Christ Jesus (2 Timothy 1:13).
Dear brothers and sisters; do you ever stop to ask yourself, “Who is it that is watching my Christian life?” You need to know that someone is watching! And you need to ask, “What do they see? Do I give them a good, godly pattern to rely on and to hold on to? Do I set an example for them that is worthy of Christ?—one that is plain and that someone can carefully follow toward growth in Jesus?” Or do you ever stop and ask yourself, “Whose example am I following right now? Is it a faithful one? It it true to Christ? What is the outcome of their walk? Will it lead me closer to Him?”
I take it by faith that, if we resolve to live a fervent, faithful life for Christ, God will set us in front of someone else that needs to see such a life and learn from it. And if we truly desire to follow a godly example Christ-likeness, God will give us one to follow. May God help us as ‘spiritual sons’ to follow carefully the example of our ‘fathers’. And as ‘spiritual fathers’, may God help us to set an example worthy of being followed!
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One of the things that good fathers do for their sons is to not only tell them what to do, but also warn them what not to do. They not only show their sons the path to walk, but also the pitfalls to avoid. We see this very clearly in Paul’s relationship with Timothy—that in a good, spiritual mentoring relationship . . .
3. EARNEST WARNINGS MUST BE GIVEN.
Near the end of Paul’s letter to Timothy—in 4:14—he wrote,
Alexander the coppersmith did me much harm. May the Lord repay him according to his works (2 Timothy 4:14).
We’re not told much about this man Alexander the coppersmith. He may be the Alexander who was mentioned in 1 Timothy 1:20; which would mean that he was someone who once professed a faith in Jesus; but who later proved to be a phony and began to oppose Paul’s ministry. Paul says that Alexander did much harm to him. And notice what Paul goes on to tell Timothy in the next verse;
You also must beware of him, for he has greatly resisted our words (v. 15).
What a necessary element this is in a spiritual ‘father/son’ relationship! The Timothy-types need the Paul-types to set them down, look them in the eye, and tell them, “Now; you must watch out for this! You must not tangle with that! Don’t go here! Avoid stepping there! I’ve been there myself; and the dangers are very real. I know what I’m talking about! Heed me in this! Don’t think that you can go there and not get hurt! Beware!”
Thank God for the ‘spiritual fathers’ who have loved their ‘spiritual sons’ enough to give them such stern warnings! May God help us to give such warnings to others when they are needed!—and heed them carefully when they’re given!
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Now; I struggle with how to best to put this next characteristic. But I think that, when I explain it, we’ll all understand what it means. Looking at the relationship between Paul and Timothy, we find that . . .
4. A WILLINGNESS TO BE LINKED-TOGETHER MUST EXIST.
You see; if you have watched movies and read books about father/son relationships—or perhaps just observe them in real life—you’ll know that there’s typically a phase when a young son holds off from being identified with his father. It’s a basic element in many such stories. The son—for some reason—resists being like his old man. In fact, the whole plot of some such stories may be about how he fights from being identified with his father until—at last—he realizes the kind of man his father really is. Then, he finally stops trying to break away; and embraces the basic identity he shares with his father.
I wonder if there wasn’t a little bit of that in Timothy toward his spiritual father Paul. He looked at Paul and saw that he suffered continually for the gospel he preached. He saw how the world despises the cross of Jesus Christ that Paul proclaimed. And he now saw that Paul had ended up in prison for the message God gave him. I suspect that Timothy sometimes hesitated out of fear; and was asking, “Who is this man that I’m hitching my wagon to? Do I really want to fully embrace this? What would happen to me if I’m identified with him?”
I suspect all of this because of what Paul wrote to him in 1:8-11. He said,
Therefore do not be ashamed of the testimony of our Lord, nor of me His prisoner, but share with me in the sufferings for the gospel according to the power of God, who has saved us and called us with a holy calling, not according to our works, but according to His own purpose and grace which was given to us in Christ Jesus before time began, but has now been revealed by the appearing of our Savior Jesus Christ, who has abolished death and brought life and immortality to light through the gospel, to which I was appointed a preacher, an apostle, and a teacher of the Gentiles (2 Timothy 1:8-11).
It was as if Paul said, “Don’t be ashamed of me, Timothy. And don’t be ashamed of the gospel I preach either—even though it has cost me so much; and even though I’m in prison for it. It’s a life-changing message. The world may not like it. Those who preach it may indeed suffer for greatly for doing so. But for everyone who hears it and believes, it is the power of God unto salvation.”
In fact, Paul calls Timothy to look beyond the present shame and on to the future glory. In verse 12, he writes;
For this reason I also suffer these things; nevertheless I am not ashamed, for I know whom I have believed and am persuaded that He is able to keep what I have committed to Him until that Day (2 Timothy 1:8-12).
May God help us, in those precious mentoring relationships, to look beyond the things that this world mocks and despises; and ahead to the glories that follow in Christ. If we do so, we will be more ready to identify ourselves with those who show us how to who suffer for the gospel’s sake.
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In a good ‘father/son’ relationship, a father often sits his son down and tells him—with all the earnestness of his being—that he must make sure to do something. He must have a clear focus in life; and give himself to it. Paul does this with Timothy; and shows us that . . .
5. A CHARGE NEEDS TO BE ISSUED.
In 4:1-5, Paul tells him;
I charge you therefore before God and the Lord Jesus Christ, who will judge the living and the dead at His appearing and His kingdom: Preach the word! Be ready in season and out of season. Convince, rebuke, exhort, with all longsuffering and teaching. For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine, but according to their own desires, because they have itching ears, they will heap up for themselves teachers; and they will turn their ears away from the truth, and be turned aside to fables. But you be watchful in all things, endure afflictions, do the work of an evangelist, fulfill your ministry (2 Timothy 4:1-5).
Look at those strong words: “I charge you . . . Preach the word!” “Be ready . . .” “Be watchful . . .” “Do the work . . .” “Fulfill your ministry . . .” So much depended on Timothy being faithful to this very serious charge. At the end of his first letter to him, Paul wrote; “O Timothy! Guard what was committed to your trust, avoiding the profane and idle babblings and contradictions of what is falsely called knowledge—by professing it some have strayed concerning the faith.”
What a great service of love ‘spiritual fathers’ serve in our lives when they set the priorities plainly before us . . . and order us to follow them!
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And in a related way, I notice too that Paul wasn’t just concerned with Timothy’s faithfulness to this call as an end in and of itself, but also for the benefit of those who Timothy himself would impact. This shows us that, in full context of all the ‘father/son’ relationships of the Christian life . . .
6. THE TORCH MUST BE PASSED.
In 2:1, we clearly see that Paul was concerned about Timothy. He wrote,
You therefore, my son, be strong in the grace that is in Christ Jesus (2 Timothy 2:1).
But Paul’s concern extended beyond just Timothy alone. He went on to urge him;
And the things that you have heard from me among many witnesses, commit these to faithful men who will be able to teach others also (v. 2).
“Pass the torch, Timothy! Do for others just as I am doing for you! Don’t let it fall to the ground! Pass it on faithfully!” When I think of this word of exhortation from Paul—the spiritual father of Timothy—I think of what it says in Psalm 78;
Give ear, O my people, to my law;
Incline your ears to the words of my mouth.
I will open my mouth in a parable;
I will utter dark sayings of old,
Which we have heard and known,
And our fathers have told us.
We will not hide them from their children,
Telling to the generation to come the praises of the Lord,
And His strength and His wonderful works that He has done.
For He established a testimony in Jacob,
And appointed a law in Israel,
Which He commanded our fathers,
That they should make them known to their children;
That the generation to come might know them,
The children who would be born,
That they may arise and declare them to their children,
That they may set their hope in God,
And not forget the works of God,
But keep His commandments;
And may not be like their fathers,
A stubborn and rebellious generation,
A generation that did not set its heart aright,
And whose spirit was not faithful to God (Psalm 78:1-8).
I am what I am today because some ‘Paul’ in my life passed the torch on to me. I must do the same for some other ‘Timothy’.
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And finally—as is so often true in a good ‘father/son’ relationship—a time comes when the roles begin to reverse a little. One who provided care for so long now needs care; and the one who received the care now needs to provide it. At the end of Paul’s letter to him, we find that as an important part of the spiritual ‘father/son’ relationship . . .
7. LOVING CARE MUST BE RETURNED.
The aging Paul—worn out and tired from his many labors; awaiting the end of his race through death—asked his beloved son-in-the-faith Timothy to provide some service to him. He wrote;
Be diligent to come to me quickly; for Demas has forsaken me, having loved this present world, and has departed for Thessalonica—Crescens for Galatia, Titus for Dalmatia. Only Luke is with me. Get Mark and bring him with you, for he is useful to me for ministry. And Tychicus I have sent to Ephesus. Bring the cloak that I left with Carpus at Troas when you come—and the books, especially the parchments (2 Timothy 4:9-13).
Winter was setting in. Paul didn’t know how long he’d have to sit in a cold prison cell all alone. And he wanted to make good use of his time. He wanted Timothy to come to him and bring his coat; and also to bring some books, and some material to write on. But don’t think that Paul simply wanted Timothy to bring things to him! He wanted Timothy himself to come. He loved his beloved son; and longed for fellowship with him. In verse 21, he writes;
Do your utmost to come before winter (21a).
May God help us not only to invest lovingly in the spiritual life of others; but also to make sure that we return the love and provide care for those who have invested in us—just as a son to a father.